








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 725 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 282 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5905 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,141 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5230 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4104 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3938 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4869 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,024,000 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flair | 72% | 50 |
| #2 | Rose | 65% | 48 |
| #3 | Sean | 58% | 130 |
| #4 | AscenD | 57% | 95 |
| #5 | KILLACAM | 54% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 53% | 253 |
| #7 | scry | 52% | 332 |
| #8 | veeR | 50% | 58 |
| #9 | fekarei | 49% | 39 |
| #10 | JDawg | 41% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scry | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Sean | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Rose | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | fekarei | 4 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scry | 1179 | 0.17 | 27 min |
| #2 | KILLACAM | 733 | 0.19 | 23 min |
| #3 | ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 300 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | Flair | 127 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sean | 114 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flair | +2.77 | 72 | 69 |
| #2 | KILLACAM | +2.33 | 78 | 75 |
| #3 | Rose | +1.38 | 82 | 51 |
| #4 | say | +1.12 | 83 | 64 |
| #5 | scry | +0.21 | 70 | 61 |





