








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 443 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 381 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4579 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,956 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6490 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3835 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 5544 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5087 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,852 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 924 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ₿ ThiaS | 58% | 60 |
| #2 | Samegame | 57% | 77 |
| #3 | MintCoder | 52% | 88 |
| #4 | Henrik | 51% | 41 |
| #5 | spreng deg ******** ᶠuᶜk | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | spreng deg ******** ᶠuᶜk | 50% | 26 |
| #6 | TeRKeL | 48% | 147 |
| #7 | mike hawk | 47% | 131 |
| #8 | Snow | 47% | 107 |
| #9 | Joh | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TeRKeL | 28 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | Snow | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | mike hawk | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | MintCoder | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Samegame | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TeRKeL | 425 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | MintCoder | 256 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | mike hawk | 227 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Snow | 224 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Samegame | 117 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snow | +2.43 | 73 | 49 |
| #2 | Samegame | +1.37 | 56 | 58 |
| #3 | ✪Panda | +1.19 | 84 | 73 |
| #4 | MintCoder | +0.56 | 73 | 54 |
| #5 | ₿ ThiaS | +0.25 | 78 | 51 |





