








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Esplay | 25 matches | 1,999 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




79 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6632 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,650 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7006 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4823 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3359 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4462 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,560,985 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 981 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miksu | 61% | 136 |
| #2 | h4rd | 54% | 264 |
| #3 | Mike() | 53% | 394 |
| #4 | Koivikse Pressa | 50% | 207 |
| #5 | sandwichEater_428kg | 44% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | h4rd | 54% | 264 |
| #3 | Mike() | 53% | 394 |
| #4 | Koivikse Pressa | 50% | 207 |
| #5 | sandwichEater_428kg | 44% | 141 |
| #6 | ♥Ropsu♥ | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miksu | 94 | 0.0368 |
| #2 | Koivikse Pressa | 34 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | h4rd | 31 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | Mike() | 20 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | sandwichEater_428kg | 13 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mike() | 1024 | 0.13 | 28 min |
| #2 | h4rd | 901 | 0.17 | 28 min |
| #3 | sandwichEater_428kg | 629 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #4 | Miksu | 531 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #5 | Koivikse Pressa | 318 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ DecoY | +2.12 | 86 | 72 |
| #2 | h4rd | +2.01 | 83 | 70 |
| #3 | Miksu | +1.93 | 62 | 51 |
| #4 | Mike() | +1.72 | 84 | 67 |
| #5 | ♥Ropsu♥ | +0.07 | 88 | 53 |





