








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 749 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 471 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 148 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




76 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4408 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,713 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2517 | 14% |
| Smokes | 4294 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5852 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 5050 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,426,192 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 362 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jyvä_kulli376 | 57% | 40 |
| #2 | ×JakeJonnw× | 52% | 457 |
| #3 | Henkk4aw | 52% | 268 |
| #4 | zupadaq | 51% | 113 |
| #5 | money criminal | 47% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Henkk4aw | 52% | 268 |
| #4 | zupadaq | 51% | 113 |
| #5 | money criminal | 47% | 87 |
| #6 | Jupi | 46% | 37 |
| #7 | Huttuz | 43% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henkk4aw | 62 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | ×JakeJonnw× | 27 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Huttuz | 25 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | jyvä_kulli376 | 15 | 0.0183 |
| #5 | zupadaq | 7 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ×JakeJonnw× | 1527 | 0.15 | 41 min |
| #2 | Henkk4aw | 497 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | Huttuz | 342 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | money criminal | 136 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | zupadaq | 123 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ×JakeJonnw× | +2.83 | 71 | 74 |
| #2 | jyvä_kulli376 | +1.27 | 85 | 40 |
| #3 | Jupi | +0.59 | 59 | 65 |
| #4 | Henkk4aw | +0.07 | 64 | 61 |
| #5 | jokke | -0.64 | 56 | 56 |





