








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 98 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,195 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2547 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1919 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1739 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 990 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,003,566 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 400 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xanderou | 74% | 34 |
| #2 | Noname | 66% | 65 |
| #3 | N1psalicious | 60% | 86 |
| #4 | hutch | 57% | 241 |
| #5 | nolgah | 57% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ☁︎key-ousuke -ilnw- | 53% | 36 |
| #7 | shops | 52% | 42 |
| #8 | Ash | 39% | 46 |
| #9 | Cevah | 37% | 30 |
| #10 | freako | 30% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | nolgah | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Xanderou | 6 | 0.0088 |
| #4 | Ash | 5 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | N1psalicious | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 635 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | Noname | 330 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #3 | nolgah | 326 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #4 | N1psalicious | 167 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ash | 143 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | +3.87 | 71 | 65 |
| #2 | Noname | +3.14 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | N1psalicious | +2.74 | 80 | 63 |
| #4 | B R A G G Y | +1.26 | 70 | 50 |
| #5 | Xanderou | +0.83 | 76 | 52 |





