








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,322 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1232 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1977 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 1204 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 909 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $379,628 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kagami shou | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | banjo | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Rev0 | 60% | 52 |
| #4 | evil bob | 56% | 41 |
| #5 | Lotragon | 54% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | evil bob | 56% | 41 |
| #5 | Lotragon | 54% | 41 |
| #6 | 2PACALYPSE | 49% | 83 |
| #7 | sct | 47% | 68 |
| #8 | Suix 7\ | 45% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev0 | 10 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | Suix 7\ | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | evil bob | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | 2PACALYPSE | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | sct | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2PACALYPSE | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | evil bob | 96 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | sct | 94 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Suix 7\ | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Rev0 | 78 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev0 | +3.34 | 81 | 49 |
| #2 | kagami shou | +1.56 | 47 | 57 |
| #3 | Kizma | +1.19 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | sct | +0.70 | 72 | 58 |
| #5 | banjo | +0.23 | 74 | 57 |





