








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1828 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,748 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1291 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2181 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 851 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1425 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $580,687 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dendy | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | Scrupe | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | sct | 54% | 92 |
| #4 | Rev0 | 54% | 160 |
| #5 | 2PACALYPSE | 52% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | 2PACALYPSE | 52% | 73 |
| #6 | evil bob | 51% | 70 |
| #7 | Lotragon | 50% | 70 |
| #8 | Kizma | 45% | 44 |
| #9 | LzrK | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev0 | 21 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | dendy | 7 | 0.0145 |
| #3 | evil bob | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | 2PACALYPSE | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Kizma | 3 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev0 | 262 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #2 | sct | 172 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | evil bob | 164 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | 2PACALYPSE | 145 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Lotragon | 126 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev0 | +3.64 | 82 | 48 |
| #2 | Scrupe | +3.56 | 85 | 53 |
| #3 | dendy | +2.98 | 72 | 67 |
| #4 | Kizma | +1.01 | 77 | 70 |
| #5 | LzrK | +0.84 | 61 | 51 |





