








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1887 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 699 matches | ||
| Premier | 288 matches | ||
| Wingman | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 95 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10631 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5250 | 14% |
| Smokes | 12640 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 8212 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 11394 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,201,759 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 777 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameSchaedl -iwnl- | 58% | 245 |
| #2 | colo | 58% | 464 |
| #3 | luckue[K] | 57% | 316 |
| #4 | NORSKIMEISTER | 56% | 160 |
| #5 | lokonat0r | 55% | 447 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Neko Ashura | 54% | 69 |
| #9 | benters - Остановить войну в Укр | 53% | 174 |
| #10 | xTy | 53% | 297 |
| #11 | Komoda- | 51% | 229 |
| #12 | eNdryK | 44% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lokonat0r | 8 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | GameSchaedl -iwnl- | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | NORSKIMEISTER | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | colo | 3 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | kixo | 2 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luckue[K] | 2028 | 0.29 | 61 min |
| #2 | kixo | 764 | 0.10 | 20 min |
| #3 | Komoda- | 727 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #4 | lokonat0r | 683 | 0.07 | 21 min |
| #5 | colo | 594 | 0.06 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luckue[K] | +2.39 | 82 | 78 |
| #2 | MR.JACKPOT | +1.23 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | GameSchaedl -iwnl- | +1.03 | 84 | 75 |
| #4 | colo | +0.89 | 71 | 55 |
| #5 | Komoda- | +0.28 | 90 | 68 |





