








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 536 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 379 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 95 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,000 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3716 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4069 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3778 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3437 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,482,790 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | lokonat0r | 54% | 233 |
| #6 | colo | 53% | 225 |
| #7 | Komoda- | 53% | 114 |
| #8 | xTy | 51% | 119 |
| #9 | benters - Остановить войну в Укр | 51% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luckue[K] | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | MR.JACKPOT | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | lokonat0r | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | GameSchaedl -iwnl- | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luckue[K] | 1833 | 0.29 | 55 min |
| #2 | MR.JACKPOT | 501 | 0.07 | 14 min |
| #3 | Komoda- | 384 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #4 | lokonat0r | 315 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #5 | colo | 294 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luckue[K] | +2.51 | 83 | 76 |
| #2 | GameSchaedl -iwnl- | +1.32 | 82 | 77 |
| #3 | MR.JACKPOT | +1.19 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | Komoda- | +0.55 | 90 | 70 |
| #5 | colo | +0.09 | 68 | 55 |





