








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1706 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 277 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,038 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10270 | 43% |
| Smokes | 6260 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3872 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3636 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,396,607 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C0UNCIL | 55% | 158 |
| #2 | SkyesJB | 51% | 210 |
| #3 | Reuben | 50% | 112 |
| #4 | Phillip K. Dog | 50% | 300 |
| #5 | jimin stan | 49% | 508 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | authentic oat beverage | 45% | 73 |
| #8 | 4klift opr8r | 45% | 136 |
| #9 | Poopy Ass | 44% | 219 |
| #10 | God's Only SOn | 42% | 266 |
| #11 | BOOF | 39% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkyesJB | 22 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | jimin stan | 15 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Phillip K. Dog | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | adPEXtwinDoNG | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | God's Only SOn | 5 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phillip K. Dog | 1386 | 0.23 | 38 min |
| #2 | adPEXtwinDoNG | 1297 | 0.15 | 29 min |
| #3 | God's Only SOn | 1217 | 0.22 | 28 min |
| #4 | jimin stan | 1171 | 0.11 | 33 min |
| #5 | SkyesJB | 953 | 0.22 | 24 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C0UNCIL | +3.27 | 73 | 59 |
| #2 | jimin stan | +2.99 | 72 | 59 |
| #3 | SkyesJB | +1.86 | 74 | 50 |
| #4 | adPEXtwinDoNG | +1.20 | 63 | 60 |
| #5 | Phillip K. Dog | +1.08 | 75 | 78 |





