








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 214 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3423 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,573 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2130 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3302 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1694 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2447 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,061,828 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 257 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jessley | 71% | 41 |
| #2 | Lil_E | 50% | 244 |
| #3 | Willow_The_Wisp | 50% | 103 |
| #4 | Slamming Avant-Cyber Shitgrind | 48% | 44 |
| #5 | Maeday | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil_E | +6.25 | 88 | 32 |
| #2 | KudoOkami | +5.29 | 59 | 37 |
| #3 | Jessley | +3.83 | 60 | 46 |
| #4 | Maeday | +0.09 | 51 | 61 |
| #5 | Slamming Avant-Cyber Shitgrind | -1.13 | 31 | 28 |





