








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 410 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 242 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3637 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,503 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4861 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3268 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4875 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2499 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $784,727 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 248 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PinkyDinky^ | 63% | 62 |
| #2 | Prophets.dk | ✪ DeTox^| | 61% | 99 |
| #3 | 🅠🅟 | 59% | 80 |
| #4 | ♿HzE♿ | 59% | 63 |
| #5 | ApeK^| ツ | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prophets.dk | ✪ DeTox^| | 236 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | 🅠🅟 | 230 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | PinkyDinky^ | 99 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | ♿HzE♿ | 84 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | ApeK^| ツ | 69 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PinkyDinky^ | +3.52 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | Mort^ | +2.16 | 81 | 74 |
| #3 | Prophets.dk | ✪ DeTox^| | +0.99 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | Hate?! | +0.76 | 63 | 70 |
| #5 | 🅠🅟 | +0.16 | 67 | 66 |





