










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,852 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2143 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1754 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2083 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1872 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $789,808 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ꧁●•*RoXy*•●꧂ | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | Umari0 | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | retarD | 51% | 204 |
| #4 | Fr0stY | 51% | 127 |
| #5 | Dravoc | 51% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | retarD | 16 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Fr0stY | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | ꧁●•*RoXy*•●꧂ | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Dravoc | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | retarD | 1178 | 0.27 | 27 min |
| #2 | Fr0stY | 248 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | Dravoc | 132 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Twitch/BugzTagem | 117 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Nusense𐂃𐂃 | 101 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | retarD | +2.18 | 51 | 79 |
| #2 | Umari0 | +0.70 | 78 | 53 |
| #3 | ꧁●•*RoXy*•●꧂ | +0.25 | 62 | 55 |
| #4 | Dravoc | -0.21 | 44 | 74 |
| #5 | Fr0stY | -0.74 | 61 | 64 |





