








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 560 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 186 matches | ||
| Premier | 161 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4447 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3509 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3745 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2876 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3110 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,420,510 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 273 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VaPoR™ | 67% | 42 |
| #2 | Jerbaut | 59% | 140 |
| #3 | wurmsoN | 58% | 53 |
| #4 | topkek | 58% | 59 |
| #5 | xDemixD | 54% | 199 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | ✪ Deejay | 45% | 40 |
| #12 | screa | 44% | 41 |
| #13 | Wrimel | 39% | 28 |
| #14 | The_Proxist | 38% | 26 |
| #15 | TooM9 | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xDemixD | 17 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | JONAZZZ | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | 트랙스 | 8 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | ✪ Deejay | 7 | 0.0081 |
| #5 | wurmsoN | 6 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jerbaut | 755 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #2 | xDemixD | 613 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #3 | wurmsoN | 347 | 0.30 | 9 min |
| #4 | JONAZZZ | 233 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | topkek | 223 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | topkek | +1.36 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | xDemixD | +1.30 | 63 | 61 |
| #3 | Jerbaut | +1.11 | 61 | 84 |
| #4 | wurmsoN | +1.01 | 72 | 79 |
| #5 | Godypmu | +0.76 | 86 | 62 |





