








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 206 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 433 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3351 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 927 | 8% |
| Smokes | 4232 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 3494 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2419 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,886,699 of utility $257 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Regina /` - . -'\ | 53% | 76 |
| #2 | Chingy | 52% | 56 |
| #3 | Placcy | 50% | 202 |
| #4 | [ZSUR] BL00D | 44% | 184 |
| #5 | Big Papa Rappa | 44% | 258 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Cenno | 43% | 119 |
| #8 | Chonky_YT | 43% | 54 |
| #9 | JM7 | 41% | 107 |
| #10 | Galo | 40% | 299 |
| #11 | Aye Aye Ron | 37% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B1lly | 15 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Big Papa Rappa | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Aye Aye Ron | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Placcy | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | [ZSUR] BL00D | 4 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Big Papa Rappa | 605 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | B1lly | 453 | 0.04 | 11 min |
| #3 | Regina /` - . -'\ | 323 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #4 | Cenno | 290 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | Chingy | 214 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Regina /` - . -'\ | +4.12 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | Chingy | +2.84 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | B1lly | +2.24 | 64 | 53 |
| #4 | Placcy | +1.65 | 44 | 53 |
| #5 | Big Papa Rappa | +1.27 | 61 | 60 |





