








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 877 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 291 matches | ||
| Wingman | 97 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3434 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,847 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4638 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4385 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1861 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2963 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,682,072 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimless | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | concon. ^^ | 54% | 48 |
| #3 | Pongle | 52% | 60 |
| #4 | Oes | 49% | 85 |
| #5 | AF SharkBearz | 48% | 389 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AF SharkBearz | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | gunfingers | 12 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Fearless | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Haemo | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Oes | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AF SharkBearz | 793 | 0.11 | 25 min |
| #2 | gunfingers | 439 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #3 | Fearless | 202 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Oes | 192 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | wa1ve | 117 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimless | +3.10 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | AF SharkBearz | +2.57 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | wa1ve | +1.57 | 87 | 60 |
| #4 | Oes | +0.54 | 77 | 67 |
| #5 | concon. ^^ | +0.00 | 78 | 52 |





