








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2052 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 372 matches | ||
| Wingman | 151 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Renown | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 161 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,937 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4031 | 18% |
| Smokes | 7421 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 5129 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5356 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,854,037 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 587 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimless | 58% | 52 |
| #2 | Enigma | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | Fearless | 55% | 78 |
| #4 | wa1ve | 51% | 76 |
| #5 | concon. ^^ | 51% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gunfingers | 13 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | AF Guppynator | 11 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Haemo | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Fearless | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | aimless | 4 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AF Guppynator | 1398 | 0.19 | 38 min |
| #2 | gunfingers | 430 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | Fearless | 209 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | Oes | 190 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | wa1ve | 136 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AF SharkBearz | +2.65 | 83 | 72 |
| #2 | aimless | +2.51 | 86 | 66 |
| #3 | wa1ve | +1.39 | 85 | 57 |
| #4 | Oes | +0.06 | 77 | 66 |
| #5 | concon. ^^ | +0.01 | 78 | 51 |





