








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1159 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,270 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5338 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4881 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1775 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3276 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,366,496 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sung Jin-Woo | 53% | 132 |
| #2 | Kakori | 53% | 290 |
| #3 | SHDGames | 52% | 227 |
| #4 | Sebastian der Speer | 52% | 167 |
| #5 | Gabs | 51% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kakori | 53% | 290 |
| #3 | SHDGames | 52% | 227 |
| #4 | Sebastian der Speer | 52% | 167 |
| #5 | Gabs | 51% | 186 |
| #6 | Stosses | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakori | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | SHDGames | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Gabs | 11 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Sebastian der Speer | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Sung Jin-Woo | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakori | 765 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #2 | SHDGames | 618 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | Gabs | 254 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | Sebastian der Speer | 205 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sung Jin-Woo | 95 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kn0rke | +2.90 | 76 | 77 |
| #2 | Kakori | +1.73 | 72 | 66 |
| #3 | Stosses | +0.51 | 76 | 55 |
| #4 | Gabs | -1.00 | 55 | 57 |
| #5 | SHDGames | -1.58 | 46 | 62 |





