








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 234 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2971 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,220 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1227 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1075 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1232 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1686 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $843,745 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phantomth1eve | 54% | 108 |
| #2 | Stev | 50% | 168 |
| #3 | Alyssa | 45% | 93 |
| #4 | ax3 | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | Iron | 38% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phantomth1eve | 29 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | Stev | 26 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | Iron | 9 | 0.0121 |
| #4 | Alyssa | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | ax3 | 5 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stev | 304 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Phantomth1eve | 191 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | ax3 | 160 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | Iron | 159 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | Alyssa | 68 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ax3 | +3.85 | 75 | 64 |
| #2 | Stev | +2.53 | 78 | 38 |
| #3 | ✪ Dale | +0.77 | 78 | 46 |
| #4 | Iron | +0.29 | 74 | 45 |
| #5 | Phantomth1eve | -0.76 | 72 | 49 |





