










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 197 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4439 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,108 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1238 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1949 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2105 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1816 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,221,889 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deepfried | 54% | 39 |
| #2 | PixelatedMemory | 49% | 243 |
| #3 | ShaneG20 | 47% | 135 |
| #4 | Griff | 47% | 57 |
| #5 | Uncle Twisty Nips | 45% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Griff | 47% | 57 |
| #5 | Uncle Twisty Nips | 45% | 71 |
| #6 | csgooch | 41% | 27 |
| #7 | CRSPYTATERTOTz | 39% | 33 |
| #8 | Craig | 39% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PixelatedMemory | 40 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Craig | 36 | 0.0181 |
| #3 | ShaneG20 | 20 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | Griff | 12 | 0.0098 |
| #5 | deepfried | 8 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PixelatedMemory | 786 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | ShaneG20 | 209 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Craig | 204 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | deepfried | 193 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Uncle Twisty Nips | 123 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Griff | +4.72 | 84 | 43 |
| #2 | csgooch | +3.03 | 81 | 59 |
| #3 | PixelatedMemory | +1.08 | 49 | 51 |
| #4 | ✯Schwifty✯ | +1.03 | 67 | 35 |
| #5 | deepfried | -0.98 | 58 | 36 |





