








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 216 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,657 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1810 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2013 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 957 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1877 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $852,877 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◥◣ . ◢◤ | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | kixetic | 58% | 45 |
| #3 | RocKin | 56% | 62 |
| #4 | TreeeZzz | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | Jet | 52% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | redavnI www.ream.team | 52% | 25 |
| #7 | ☁ PotaTom | 48% | 48 |
| #8 | mutant | 46% | 100 |
| #9 | old man Jenkins | 44% | 140 |
| #10 | glasses | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jet | 18 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | old man Jenkins | 14 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | mutant | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | kixetic | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | ◥◣ . ◢◤ | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mutant | 341 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | Jet | 290 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | RocKin | 260 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | old man Jenkins | 120 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | kixetic | 112 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jet | +4.75 | 89 | 52 |
| #2 | ◥◣ . ◢◤ | +3.56 | 82 | 58 |
| #3 | RocKin | +1.23 | 72 | 75 |
| #4 | kixetic | +1.19 | 60 | 60 |
| #5 | TreeeZzz | -0.19 | 82 | 63 |





