








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 165 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 221 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1670 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,466 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 875 | 14% |
| Smokes | 985 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 3313 | 51% |
| Molotovs | 1293 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $636,970 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ph0en1x | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Slonja | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | ec0 | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | masjasik | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | juke | 4 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slonja | 315 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #2 | masjasik | 276 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #3 | ec0 | 134 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | ph0en1x | 128 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | Iggy | 126 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juke | +3.68 | 46 | 55 |
| #2 | Iggy | +3.30 | 64 | 69 |
| #3 | masjasik | +3.04 | 37 | 65 |
| #4 | ph0en1x | +2.98 | 46 | 60 |
| #5 | Slonja | -0.01 | 40 | 57 |





