








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 774 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 304 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6586 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,103 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3474 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5725 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3640 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3264 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,833,825 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kza? | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | N0kizzz | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | Vitality Diamsmen | 54% | 72 |
| #4 | Kuruko_bdn | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Pony β | 47% | 349 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Pony β | 47% | 349 |
| #6 | SkillfulFrog | 46% | 82 |
| #7 | Princesse Lusmak | 42% | 102 |
| #8 | DwayneCalzon | 42% | 53 |
| #9 | DeramK | 37% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkillfulFrog | 45 | 0.0270 |
| #2 | Pony β | 18 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Vitality Diamsmen | 14 | 0.0097 |
| #4 | Kuruko_bdn | 12 | 0.0119 |
| #5 | DwayneCalzon | 10 | 0.0090 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pony β | 401 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #2 | SkillfulFrog | 361 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #3 | Princesse Lusmak | 232 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Kuruko_bdn | 132 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | DwayneCalzon | 73 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0kizzz | +7.30 | 95 | 47 |
| #2 | SkillfulFrog | +7.10 | 88 | 44 |
| #3 | Kza? | +3.08 | 94 | 40 |
| #4 | DeramK | +2.26 | 71 | 64 |
| #5 | π
²ππππ
Έπ | +1.68 | 75 | 51 |





