








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
525 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,379 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 86 | 6% |
| Smokes | 93 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 1003 | 73% |
| Molotovs | 197 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $131,699 of utility $51 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | KanaaaaR | 57% | 30 |
| #7 | gameur gaming | 50% | 20 |
| #8 | RedSheep | 46% | 39 |
| #9 | Kebab | 44% | 27 |
| #10 | Kanaaaa | 44% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RedSheep | 15 | 0.0196 |
| #2 | Kanaaaa | 14 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Kebab | 11 | 0.0212 |
| #4 | Kanaaaa Hih | 6 | 0.0251 |
| #5 | DevilPanik | 5 | 0.0350 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FrenchDoomer | 56 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | RedSheep | 54 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Kebab | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Izuto | 30 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #5 | Kanaaaa | 23 | 0.02 | 1 min |





