








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
265 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 548 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 215 | 39% |
| Smokes | 196 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 17 | 3% |
| Molotovs | 120 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $119,800 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rohen | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | CARLO5 | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | PapaSmurf | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Churros | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | M4rc | 60% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Sem.exe | 47% | 15 |
| #10 | FlueDo- | 45% | 11 |
| #11 | WAL | 43% | 7 |
| #12 | Pang | 33% | 3 |
| #13 | Y0uM0mD0g | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henlo | 3 | 0.0160 |
| #2 | WAL | 2 | 0.0134 |
| #3 | Sem.exe | 1 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | PapaSmurf | 1 | 0.0159 |
| #5 | Pang | 1 | 0.0182 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4rc | 51 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #2 | WAL | 47 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #3 | Churros | 20 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #4 | Sem.exe | 17 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | FlueDo- | 16 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoof | +2.58 | 94 | 41 |
| #2 | Naud | +2.56 | 63 | 69 |
| #3 | Sem.exe | +0.85 | 89 | 55 |
| #4 | CARLO5 | +0.68 | 50 | 52 |
| #5 | infi- | +0.35 | 57 | 71 |





