








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 148 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
286 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,590 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 588 | 37% |
| Smokes | 376 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 255 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 371 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $219,563 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mRn | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | M4rc | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Stoof | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | rohen | 56% | 18 |
| #5 | Henlo | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | cr4M | 48% | 27 |
| #9 | PB | 47% | 17 |
| #10 | WAL | 45% | 38 |
| #11 | FlueDo- | 31% | 13 |
| #12 | Sem.exe | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WAL | 14 | 0.0172 |
| #2 | cr4M | 4 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | Henlo | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | M4rc | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Stoof | 2 | 0.0174 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WAL | 263 | 0.32 | 5 min |
| #2 | cr4M | 74 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | M4rc | 54 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Y0uM0mD0g | 40 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | rohen | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cr4M | +4.08 | 95 | 45 |
| #2 | popododer | +3.69 | 81 | 59 |
| #3 | Stoof | +3.06 | 98 | 45 |
| #4 | Y0uM0mD0g | +2.18 | 83 | 47 |
| #5 | PB | +1.88 | 65 | 67 |





