








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
926 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,920 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 429 | 22% |
| Smokes | 206 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 696 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 589 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $418,723 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cormaster | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | PopperuD | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Chaze | 55% | 47 |
| #4 | goliih👑 | 55% | 85 |
| #5 | Lepteen | 54% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Malachai | 7 | 0.0530 |
| #2 | goliih👑 | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Cormaster | 2 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | 0/ | 2 | 0.0152 |
| #5 | Lepteen | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goliih👑 | 174 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | PopperuD | 82 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #3 | Lepteen | 71 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Chaze | 47 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Cormaster | 28 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0/ | +3.64 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | Lepteen | +1.01 | 83 | 61 |
| #3 | swollebaek | +0.83 | 85 | 40 |
| #4 | Kainye | +0.42 | 89 | 60 |
| #5 | PopperuD | +0.21 | 62 | 68 |





