








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1530 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 768 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 122 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9378 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6062 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4354 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 8469 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 3477 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,132,656 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1451 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aika | 79% | 47 |
| #2 | .dabo | 53% | 51 |
| #3 | Lokiii | 51% | 107 |
| #4 | xz0r | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | j0s | 49% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aika | 79% | 47 |
| #2 | .dabo | 53% | 51 |
| #3 | Lokiii | 51% | 107 |
| #4 | xz0r | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | j0s | 49% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0s | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Lokiii | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | xz0r | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | .dabo | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lokiii | 127 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | .dabo | 124 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | j0s | 112 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | xz0r | 99 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | aika | 52 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aika | +3.46 | 98 | 69 |
| #2 | xz0r | +1.72 | 85 | 61 |
| #3 | j0s | +1.08 | 90 | 61 |
| #4 | 𝗠 𝗮 𝘅 𝗫 | +0.73 | 80 | 66 |
| #5 | .dabo | +0.31 | 72 | 73 |





