








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1603 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 705 matches | ||
| Faceit | 160 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9780 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,077 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7655 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7941 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9879 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 5602 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,492,865 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2099 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kronix | 57% | 213 |
| #2 | Noidontthinkso. | 55% | 69 |
| #3 | crayzer1no | 55% | 377 |
| #4 | SlooBOB | 54% | 471 |
| #5 | JAYBE | 54% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | SCrapleTV | 47% | 53 |
| #11 | נυʟıαп | 46% | 146 |
| #12 | AalongTimeAgo | 45% | 212 |
| #13 | Skeiperrr 幸福 | 44% | 52 |
| #14 | Lokiii | 43% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SlooBOB | 21 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | 4MIR | 19 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | crayzer1no | 15 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | .dabo | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | kronix | 8 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crayzer1no | 1284 | 0.17 | 34 min |
| #2 | SlooBOB | 1265 | 0.13 | 33 min |
| #3 | .dabo | 911 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #4 | AalongTimeAgo | 842 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #5 | fatty | 685 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crayzer1no | +2.01 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | SlooBOB | +1.07 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | JAYBE | +1.05 | 91 | 65 |
| #4 | kronix | +1.02 | 79 | 51 |
| #5 | xz0r | +0.98 | 84 | 60 |





