








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1953 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 290 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 175 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4097 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,175 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2236 | 14% |
| Smokes | 4466 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4686 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4787 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,148,555 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1234 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | castellano | 68% | 28 |
| #2 | ЗkywaIker | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | Flavier | 58% | 31 |
| #4 | Team Saenk | 18Steven | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | JustAPilot | 52% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Darki | 49% | 49 |
| #8 | NOname | 47% | 32 |
| #9 | obeey | 46% | 28 |
| #10 | Atominat1on | 35% | 34 |
| #11 | MaGgiX | 32% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustAPilot | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Snibbels™ | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Darki | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | MaGgiX | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | castellano | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustAPilot | 244 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | Atominat1on | 229 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #3 | Darki | 149 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | Snibbels™ | 121 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | obeey | 121 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | obeey | +1.90 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | ЗkywaIker | +1.56 | 84 | 71 |
| #3 | Smartii | +0.94 | 82 | 68 |
| #4 | Flavier | +0.39 | 85 | 49 |
| #5 | NOname | -0.60 | 59 | 56 |





