








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 252 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 192 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1973 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,234 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3043 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2696 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2752 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2743 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $451,916 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 332 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asi | 63% | 43 |
| #2 | NAERHI | 54% | 26 |
| #3 | Dynlo | 50% | 202 |
| #4 | SirSandels | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | 48% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dynlo | 44 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | El Morty | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | NAERHI | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | HUOLTOMIES ES4✈ CEISSI | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dynlo | 653 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #2 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | 259 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | Asi | 158 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | NAERHI | 119 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | El Morty | 109 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NAERHI | +4.93 | 71 | 77 |
| #2 | Dynlo2 | +4.33 | 67 | 56 |
| #3 | Dynlo | +3.05 | 73 | 62 |
| #4 | rempparene | +1.99 | 70 | 72 |
| #5 | HUOLTOMIES ES4✈ CEISSI | +0.32 | 71 | 69 |





