








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 556 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 412 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3358 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3948 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3622 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4782 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3915 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,901,014 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marsunvittu | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | HUOLTOMIES ES4✈ CEISSI | 52% | 101 |
| #3 | Dynlo2 | 49% | 78 |
| #4 | Asi | 43% | 37 |
| #5 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | 43% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dynlo | 29 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | SirSandels | 19 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | HUOLTOMIES ES4✈ CEISSI | 8 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Dynlo2 | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Marsunvittu | 6 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dynlo | 718 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | 403 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #3 | SirSandels | 343 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | Dynlo2 | 268 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | NoXi | 239 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dynlo2 | +5.17 | 72 | 61 |
| #2 | Dynlo | +4.53 | 75 | 62 |
| #3 | Marsunvittu | +0.88 | 50 | 64 |
| #4 | Lärvi ♥ Phinis | +0.73 | 56 | 62 |
| #5 | HUOLTOMIES ES4✈ CEISSI | +0.72 | 66 | 65 |





