








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,115 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3739 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3093 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2107 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2176 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $892,255 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnnyb0y | 51% | 95 |
| #2 | Keppana | 46% | 171 |
| #3 | ThadLad | 45% | 107 |
| #4 | Ilu | 44% | 140 |
| #5 | K.A Torikka | 44% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ThadLad | 45% | 107 |
| #4 | Ilu | 44% | 140 |
| #5 | K.A Torikka | 44% | 209 |
| #6 | vily | 42% | 24 |
| #7 | Jiemel | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ilu | 13 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Keppana | 12 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | J0hnnyb0y | 11 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | K.A Torikka | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | ThadLad | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keppana | 506 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | K.A Torikka | 500 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | J0hnnyb0y | 361 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #4 | ThadLad | 302 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Ilu | 299 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnnyb0y | +2.77 | 86 | 65 |
| #2 | Keppana | +1.45 | 70 | 59 |
| #3 | Ilu | +0.32 | 72 | 61 |
| #4 | Jiemel | +0.06 | 52 | 53 |
| #5 | vily | -0.08 | 69 | 69 |





