








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1657 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,631 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1602 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2022 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1725 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1282 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $388,035 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThadLad | 47% | 89 |
| #2 | RonXx | 46% | 171 |
| #3 | J0hnnyb0y | 45% | 40 |
| #4 | K.A Torikka | 45% | 110 |
| #5 | vily | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | RonXx | 46% | 171 |
| #3 | J0hnnyb0y | 45% | 40 |
| #4 | K.A Torikka | 45% | 110 |
| #5 | vily | 44% | 27 |
| #6 | Ilu | 42% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RonXx | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Ilu | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | K.A Torikka | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | J0hnnyb0y | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | vily | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RonXx | 457 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | K.A Torikka | 299 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | ThadLad | 257 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | Ilu | 174 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | vily | 117 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keppana | +1.41 | 71 | 59 |
| #2 | J0hnnyb0y | +1.05 | 88 | 67 |
| #3 | Ilu | +0.06 | 75 | 61 |
| #4 | RonXx | -0.56 | 59 | 57 |
| #5 | vily | -0.80 | 69 | 63 |





