








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2077 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 313 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 127 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7906 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7857 | 35% |
| Smokes | 5425 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4830 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4502 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $473,921 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1363 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aaronairo | 73% | 48 |
| #2 | KS# | 69% | 55 |
| #3 | YoungToast | 59% | 160 |
| #4 | Grandan | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | Princess Kenneth | 54% | 351 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | quals | 52% | 63 |
| #7 | IPaRaNoMaL | 50% | 42 |
| #8 | uncle snoop^劈 | 49% | 91 |
| #9 | Zorkey | 49% | 183 |
| #10 | Swooty Zimbabwian | 38% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zorkey | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | YoungToast | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Princess Kenneth | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | uncle snoop^劈 | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | quals | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Princess Kenneth | 707 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #2 | YoungToast | 291 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | uncle snoop^劈 | 225 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Zorkey | 99 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #5 | Aaronairo | 83 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fjiuM ツ | +6.65 | 88 | 72 |
| #2 | Grandan | +1.17 | 81 | 58 |
| #3 | Aaronairo | +1.04 | 71 | 66 |
| #4 | IPaRaNoMaL | -0.94 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | Zorkey | -1.48 | 68 | 51 |





