








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 241 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,437 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2283 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2819 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2166 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1169 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $747,771 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G1ADi | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | ed | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | bNastyy | 58% | 60 |
| #4 | Miss C ♡ | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | Jessica ♥ Rose° 장미 | 55% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Airexial | 50% | 121 |
| #11 | ohdangggwen | 50% | 26 |
| #12 | Phil | 47% | 17 |
| #13 | EdgΞ 🐼 | 47% | 79 |
| #14 | perry the platypus | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meepins64 | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Airexial | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | pretty boopie | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Mr.Phantastic | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | dashNTP [diamondhands] | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Airexial | 394 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | dashNTP [diamondhands] | 270 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Mr.Phantastic | 249 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | pretty boopie | 210 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | perry the platypus | 208 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spookie_GRND | +3.25 | 81 | 63 |
| #2 | pretty boopie | +1.63 | 82 | 48 |
| #3 | Meepins64 | +0.95 | 81 | 41 |
| #4 | Mr.Phantastic | +0.47 | 69 | 64 |
| #5 | bNastyy | -0.24 | 88 | 57 |





