








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 431 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 384 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3459 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,922 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4811 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4843 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4229 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4039 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,082,789 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phil | 55% | 89 |
| #2 | Jessica ♥ Rose° 장미 | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | bNastyy | 54% | 122 |
| #4 | ☪️ʚ♛SUPUKI💤美惜ニローニɞ💜 | 53% | 260 |
| #5 | Mr.Phantastic | 53% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Meepins64 | 51% | 397 |
| #9 | Airexial | 51% | 261 |
| #10 | perry the platypus | 50% | 102 |
| #11 | EdgΞ 🐼 | 47% | 121 |
| #12 | E. Jack Ulayte | 45% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meepins64 | 13 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | ☪️ʚ♛SUPUKI💤美惜ニローニɞ💜 | 8 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Airexial | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Spookie_GRND | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | pretty boopie | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☪️ʚ♛SUPUKI💤美惜ニローニɞ💜 | 783 | 0.14 | 22 min |
| #2 | Airexial | 772 | 0.14 | 18 min |
| #3 | Mr.Phantastic | 493 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #4 | perry the platypus | 382 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #5 | Meepins64 | 359 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☪️ʚ♛SUPUKI💤美惜ニローニɞ💜 | +3.58 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | Spookie_GRND | +3.24 | 83 | 60 |
| #3 | Meepins64 | +1.58 | 84 | 42 |
| #4 | Mr.Phantastic | +0.84 | 71 | 66 |
| #5 | pretty boopie | +0.80 | 82 | 45 |





