








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 902 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 455 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7330 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,049 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6140 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4509 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4151 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4249 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,711,500 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1735 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | huntrix | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | mystic | 55% | 111 |
| #3 | kik[N]it | 55% | 213 |
| #4 | husky | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | Ren0_Loses | 47% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | mystic | 55% | 111 |
| #3 | kik[N]it | 55% | 213 |
| #4 | husky | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | Ren0_Loses | 47% | 30 |
| #6 | iD_ | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mystic | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | kik[N]it | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Ren0_Loses | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | husky | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | iD_ | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kik[N]it | 713 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #2 | iD_ | 230 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | mystic | 202 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | husky | 195 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | huntrix | 139 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bekim | +2.12 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | kik[N]it | +1.33 | 68 | 59 |
| #3 | huntrix | +0.24 | 64 | 74 |
| #4 | mystic | -0.03 | 77 | 58 |
| #5 | Ren0_Loses | -1.65 | 59 | 45 |





