








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 607 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2980 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,983 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1894 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1973 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2249 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1867 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,355,676 of utility $254 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 791 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dicky__ | AGREED | 87% | 39 |
| #2 | zazzel | 81% | 43 |
| #3 | pez | 78% | 45 |
| #4 | Pickadollen301 | 67% | 112 |
| #5 | scramble | 66% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Floppyh | 62% | 97 |
| #8 | hetsåhärdå | 61% | 36 |
| #9 | Advokaten | 58% | 95 |
| #10 | 1280x960 | 57% | 54 |
| #11 | WhoCares | 50% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pickadollen301 | 28 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Advokaten | 13 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | 1280x960 | 12 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | fredde | 11 | 0.0124 |
| #5 | pez | 5 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppyh | 283 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | zazzel | 170 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #3 | Pickadollen301 | 165 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | pez | 100 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | dicky__ | AGREED | 95 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hetsåhärdå | +7.41 | 79 | 45 |
| #2 | scramble | +7.13 | 74 | 57 |
| #3 | zazzel | +6.87 | 93 | 59 |
| #4 | pez | +5.29 | 82 | 55 |
| #5 | 1280x960 | +5.11 | 71 | 44 |





