








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 336 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,012 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 757 | 25% |
| Smokes | 647 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 476 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1132 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $416,693 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chinese Biggie | 26 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | RedMan | 18 | 0.0146 |
| #3 | James | 13 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Makka Pakka | 7 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | RULE BY ADO | 7 | 0.0165 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chinese Biggie | 414 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #2 | James | 384 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | RedMan | 173 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | RULE BY ADO | 88 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Trev | 73 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | James | +4.35 | 76 | 53 |
| #2 | Owen | +1.64 | 53 | 25 |
| #3 | Chinese Biggie | +1.56 | 56 | 49 |
| #4 | RedMan | +0.32 | 57 | 38 |
| #5 | Trev | +0.08 | 68 | 43 |





