








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 261 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1957 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,031 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 907 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1386 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1997 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1741 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $625,860 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Trüdüm | 53% | 34 |
| #12 | Meister Eder | 52% | 21 |
| #13 | Sküfrük | 51% | 70 |
| #14 | RYZZIE | 49% | 88 |
| #15 | hydrra | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knebl | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Acidman on Andy | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Falco | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Trüdüm | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | bris cumstead | 2 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acidman on Andy | 188 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Falco | 152 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | Gotsii | 96 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | RYZZIE | 86 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sküfrük | 73 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bris cumstead | +4.04 | 80 | 50 |
| #2 | Gotsii | +2.12 | 78 | 65 |
| #3 | Sküfrük | +1.78 | 73 | 43 |
| #4 | Falco | +1.63 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | Schwobit | +1.50 | 72 | 58 |





