








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 337 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 212 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2157 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,371 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2663 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2114 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2289 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2305 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $776,781 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 208 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JacobT_ | 84% | 19 |
| #2 | Mazy | 78% | 37 |
| #3 | Knocks | 76% | 96 |
| #4 | ROb | 75% | 24 |
| #5 | Tyson | 75% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jedi Ken | 16 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | M1KA | 13 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Ochsner | 12 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | Tomas | 12 | 0.0177 |
| #5 | Mazy | 9 | 0.0131 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1KA | 451 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #2 | Knocks | 293 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | Ochsner | 265 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | chowder | 264 | 0.27 | 6 min |
| #5 | Jedi Ken | 201 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knocks | +3.59 | 63 | 87 |
| #2 | Mazy | +3.27 | 67 | 61 |
| #3 | Ishtar | +2.86 | 99 | 39 |
| #4 | Tomas | +2.81 | 66 | 76 |
| #5 | Donnie (The Problem) | +2.46 | 74 | 73 |





