








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 562 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 192 matches | ||
| Faceit | 187 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5142 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2183 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2808 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4148 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5100 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,616,564 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 325 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TamTam | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Berda | 64% | 58 |
| #3 | Zyrx | 63% | 60 |
| #4 | Dwcollier | 62% | 66 |
| #5 | breathy | 62% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | lepicah | 56% | 50 |
| #13 | Hydra | 53% | 53 |
| #14 | Αdmin | 52% | 62 |
| #15 | bWiLLzzzzzz | 50% | 141 |
| #16 | Anderñas | 49% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE HAT MAN | 16 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Andy ^^ | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | iro | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Dwcollier | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Zyrx | 5 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andy ^^ | 711 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #2 | bWiLLzzzzzz | 604 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #3 | iro | 475 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #4 | THE HAT MAN | 427 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #5 | Anderñas | 210 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Av3ry | +3.04 | 64 | 58 |
| #2 | Zyrx | +3.02 | 82 | 65 |
| #3 | peath | +1.73 | 82 | 48 |
| #4 | bWiLLzzzzzz | +1.44 | 73 | 78 |
| #5 | Dwcollier | +1.39 | 75 | 50 |





