








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 773 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,612 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1455 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2026 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2922 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 2209 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,960,685 of utility $253 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | breathy | 80% | 20 |
| #2 | Berda | 72% | 29 |
| #3 | TamTam | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | peath | 62% | 66 |
| #5 | Hyperion | 61% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | LuV_Anarchy | 51% | 130 |
| #11 | PiggyPlayz | 48% | 31 |
| #12 | melvin | 48% | 25 |
| #13 | StabbingFrenchToast | 47% | 32 |
| #14 | Than0s | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE HAT MAN | 50 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Elixir | 47 | 0.0122 |
| #3 | LuV_Anarchy | 16 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | melvin | 14 | 0.0304 |
| #5 | s4k | 11 | 0.0112 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE HAT MAN | 825 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #2 | Elixir | 362 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | LuV_Anarchy | 326 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | TamTam | 119 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | peath | 75 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hyperion | +3.59 | 72 | 60 |
| #2 | peath | +1.71 | 86 | 50 |
| #3 | LuV_Anarchy | +1.51 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | Dwcollier | +1.37 | 75 | 45 |
| #5 | Berda | +0.46 | 77 | 46 |





