








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 643 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4560 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,471 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3550 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3051 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3723 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4147 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,684,913 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swol Cheese | 59% | 148 |
| #2 | RauchPotato | 53% | 319 |
| #3 | Cardo | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | lonlei | 49% | 47 |
| #5 | FOENEM | 49% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Huch | 46% | 76 |
| #8 | f12h | 45% | 31 |
| #9 | Master Downs32 | 45% | 118 |
| #10 | BeanCarrot | 38% | 24 |
| #11 | Maximus | 27% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RauchPotato | 14 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Swol Cheese | 12 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | lonlei | 10 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | Master Downs32 | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | FOENEM | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RauchPotato | 978 | 0.15 | 30 min |
| #2 | Master Downs32 | 180 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | FOENEM | 175 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Huch | 171 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Maximus | 151 | 0.30 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeanCarrot | +2.49 | 72 | 68 |
| #2 | Huch | +2.05 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | Rygoodie | +1.77 | 68 | 60 |
| #4 | RauchPotato | +1.73 | 66 | 63 |
| #5 | f12h | +1.16 | 58 | 70 |





