








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1176 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,714 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 845 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1058 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1022 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 789 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $313,911 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | virne ;) | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | y | 60% | 55 |
| #3 | StarBoY | 55% | 66 |
| #4 | -Ek- | 52% | 33 |
| #5 | kassu69 | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | -Ek- | 52% | 33 |
| #5 | kassu69 | 50% | 10 |
| #6 | F O R E X Q | 50% | 14 |
| #7 | Re1n | 44% | 32 |
| #8 | Lape | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Ek- | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | F O R E X Q | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StarBoY | 153 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | Re1n | 100 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | y | 55 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | kassu69 | 50 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | F O R E X Q | 43 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F O R E X Q | +2.00 | 59 | 55 |
| #2 | -Ek- | +1.66 | 93 | 52 |
| #3 | v1nci | +0.79 | 76 | 65 |
| #4 | Re1n | +0.75 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | kassu69 | +0.45 | 47 | 56 |





