








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
555 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,980 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 789 | 26% |
| Smokes | 166 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 1121 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 904 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $45,776 of utility $19 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bog Roll | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Genghis | 57% | 49 |
| #3 | Crust_X | 50% | 90 |
| #4 | clapper. | 47% | 111 |
| #5 | Luc | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Crust_X | 50% | 90 |
| #4 | clapper. | 47% | 111 |
| #5 | Luc | 43% | 40 |
| #6 | faillingmoose | 33% | 39 |
| #7 | BLYATMAN | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clapper. | 11 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Crust_X | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | faillingmoose | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | BLYATMAN | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Genghis | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clapper. | 126 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | Genghis | 61 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Crust_X | 41 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | faillingmoose | 31 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Luc | 13 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Genghis | +6.41 | 90 | 56 |
| #2 | Crust_X | +3.44 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | clapper. | +1.72 | 73 | 41 |
| #4 | faillingmoose | -0.90 | 48 | 33 |
| #5 | Luc | -1.08 | 49 | 34 |





