








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1312 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,068 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2011 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1531 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1272 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1254 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $320,157 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 331 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yamaha ei pamaha | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Latepate | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | ilqqq | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | Jesmo | 49% | 61 |
| #5 | mömmö | 47% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kalzu | 42% | 31 |
| #9 | testofaija | 41% | 22 |
| #10 | siivekäs | 38% | 24 |
| #11 | Jari | 33% | 6 |
| #12 | JoonaNd | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | late | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Jesmo | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | mömmö | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | ilqqq | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | Latepate | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | late | 162 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #2 | Jesmo | 97 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | mömmö | 90 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | kalzu | 88 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | siivekäs | 73 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latepate | +2.92 | 93 | 39 |
| #2 | mömmö | +2.19 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | siivekäs | +1.28 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | jahnu | +0.53 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | late | -0.25 | 63 | 59 |





