








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 654 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2873 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1488 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2455 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2537 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1736 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,337,627 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 274 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | kalzu | 45% | 22 |
| #10 | Bender | 41% | 29 |
| #11 | testofaija | 41% | 22 |
| #12 | ilqqq | 40% | 25 |
| #13 | Latepate | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TiMBULA | 551 | 0.25 | 9 min |
| #2 | Vattu | 525 | 0.30 | 16 min |
| #3 | jahnu | 508 | 0.29 | 13 min |
| #4 | Professor ZN1CK | 313 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #5 | Jesmo | 114 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mömmö | +2.47 | 77 | 60 |
| #2 | Bender | +1.41 | 53 | 47 |
| #3 | Latepate | +1.36 | 91 | 45 |
| #4 | Vattu | +1.31 | 61 | 73 |
| #5 | late | +0.96 | 70 | 55 |





