








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1807 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,443 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1567 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1364 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 852 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 660 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $906,307 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 208 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asrii | 48% | 130 |
| #2 | VorLo | 47% | 224 |
| #3 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 46% | 68 |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asrii | 48% | 130 |
| #2 | VorLo | 47% | 224 |
| #3 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 46% | 68 |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VorLo | 65 | 0.0148 |
| #2 | Asrii | 44 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 11 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | 9 | 0.0165 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VorLo | 1038 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #2 | Asrii | 418 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 262 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | 102 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VorLo | +2.85 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | Asrii | +1.50 | 68 | 49 |
| #3 | SadPeepoJuicebox | +0.37 | 62 | 68 |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | -1.82 | 52 | 47 |
| #5 | LaxerFart enjoyer | -1.97 | 75 | 43 |





